You're Still Fat

summer

Make America Eat Again

Food, Looqs, FashimCaitlin VanderKlokComment
red, white & regret

red, white & regret

Some bb with bad brows once snapchatted us "what you eat in private, you wear in public." And to that we say....."k." After googling 'eating clean' and only finding youtube videos of millenials under 100 lbs, we gave up and just put american cheese directly on our upper arms, eliminating the middle man. 

In honor of god blessing the vets, four day weekends, and well-done third degree burns on the back thighs below your bun cheeks (you know the spot) we bring you the do's and absolfuckinlutely do-not's of BB-Q season. Dust off your last season are-these-still-chic birkenstocks, throw on a marimekko for Target caftan and swig some Skinny Girl margarita straight from the freezer, then find out how we made raw meat actually work as a really great & organic arch support. Chic!        

you say tomato, we say stiletto 

you say tomato, we say stiletto 

Begin below the ankle with a vegan statement piece rich in primary colors and "nutrients." Bonus points if the banana peel acts as a moisturizer for your knock-off-mohawk-YSL callouses. 

frank you sir, may i have another?

frank you sir, may i have another?

Let the meat-eaters in your life know that you're really into GMO's of every variety with all-beef accoutrements, wafting with the subtle romantic scent of the chargrilled season. Top it off with your own take on toppings, Chic-ago style.

JELLO FROM THE OTHERSIDE

JELLO FROM THE OTHERSIDE

Create a well-balanced ball-to-heel support with the perfect pairings of appeteasers, main, and dessert courses, all where the weight will end up eventually--your cankles! 

#neverforget: beauty fades, hunger remains

#neverforget: beauty fades, hunger remains

Finally, steal the spotlight from the dessert table with some low calorie substitutes for your appendages. A pop of color & convenient calories = YUM! 

Gingham-filled gratitude to Marina for eating the watermelon and snapping our v v raw looqs.


Summer Spirit Animal: Lily-Rose Depp

birth weight, LooqsCaitlin VanderKlokComment
Lily-Rose modeling YSF's daily recommended calorie intake for summer.

Lily-Rose modeling YSF's daily recommended calorie intake for summer.

May 27th marked the 16th birthday of Lily-Rose Depp and the day we found our soulmate for the next three, sweaty months. After much (needed) google-imaging of Johnny's first-born, we couldn't help but swallow the reasons why she's the Official YSF Summer Spirit Animal©. So we listed them out:  

  • Body of a 12-year-old

  • Karl loves her

  • Diet C. always always always in hand, a YSF gal's staple summer meal.

  • Eyebrows. One more time: EYEBROWS.

  • Youth (RIP)

  • French

lilyrose

L-R, as we like to call her, clearly knows that a girl needs her sustenance before a Target run (oh YUM, is that an In-N-Out?), and that the ideal accessory to a ripped-jeans-and-Docs looq is a dash of refined sugar. 

Simply by pairing a classic tee or tank tucked into jeans or jean shorts with a tiny Olsen arm, the giant food and drink items are perfectly complimented.

target
black jeans (beatles)

note the attention to proportion detail

lily-rose-melody-depp
big gulp

Our summer mantra? When life gives you lemons, buy a SUPER Big Gulp and squeeze that shit in there.

We really appreciate the amount of ice L-R puts in her Big Gulp. It's the summer. Ice is to be used as much and as often as possible, especially as a meal (except you, California).

And while you're at it, squeeze in a few dozen ice cream meals. It's only natural.

One scoop?! Make it two, I ain't drivin'.

One scoop?! Make it two, I ain't drivin'.


This post is in no way sponsored by or affiliated with Diet Coke, 7-11, Target or Baskin Robbins.